Nothing scares me anymore

June has a certain smell, but I guess all months do. It's less apparent in the city of course, after his final exams he wants to go south to the ocean and the flowers and the sand. "Just the two of us" he says but I have a feeling we won't be alone for long.

My father took me to Antibes one summer, I remember it in much the same way it is now but the colors are different, tinted in subdued shades of yellow and brown: him, dashing in light linen suits in the crowds along the boardwalks, ethereal and free.

When I walked behind him he would turn around and look at me with his invisible smile, I was always the only one who saw it. Mother called him heartless so many times that I almost started to think it was true. When he died I was no longer afraid of the bad things that could happen because everything already had.