In the mornings I see him as if through a
smudged window, his hair a sun-bleached bird's nest and his nomad hands
buried somewhere deep under the pillow (they change positions a thousand
times in one night). We take the train away from the melting asphalt
and the restlessness, all along the coastline are shimmering beaches and
the mountains, flickering by like images from a dream.
We see
people living their lives in bathing suits, in the sand, tanned young
couples and families with little children running aimlessly close to the
water's edge.
He looks at them in silence, leaning still against
the warm glass. When his voice breaks the silence it's without warning
and it wakes me from something that feels like sleep. "I don't want what
they have" he says, "I just wish that if I did it would make me happy".
He turns to look at me, the temperature drops a hundred degrees and
I've never wanted him closer.
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