Sunday, October 14, 2012

In my arms she was always Lolita

When I'm alone on weekends I sleep under the pearl white silk sheets in mother's bed. I did it all the time in LA, I guess it brings me back. To what I don't know.

She keeps a copy of Nabokov's "Lolita" on her slenderly elegant little rococo night stand, I go through it page by page to read her notes and see what paragraphs are underlined. I've wondered which of the characters she identifies with, once I even tried asking her but she dodged the question by returning it to me. Are you a Humbert or a Lo?

Next to the book stands that framed picture, the black and white one from Moscow's snowy Red Square. He doesn't smile, her father, my grandfather, but I don't know that he ever did. He doesn't look unhappy but there's something in his eyes, a small crack in the statuesque exterior, and if I didn't know any better I'd say it looks like fear.








45 comments:

  1. i want to know where his fear is coming from...

    your writing always come from somewhere deep, avy. LOVE this.

    ❤❤❤

    inspiration from the little things

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh avy, as you know i do love your blog and your writing dearly, but in my opinion, lolita is a horrible book about abuse. the wonderful artistic language seems to disguise that to most, but i firmly believe that is NO love story but a record of a very sick and violent mind.

    Just my thoughts.

    love,

    l.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It's always hard, find something so personal of your mother...
    Have a good week ^^

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello Dear! I like your blog so much! This is my first visit here but definitely not the last :) Would you like to follow each other? :)


    XOXO,
    Monika

    ReplyDelete
  5. Lolita is such a classic. And I'm curious about the answer to the Humbert or Lo question!

    aspiringforever.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. I dreamed of Lolita last night. I woke with my sheets crumpled at my feet.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am really waiting to read more !!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Love your writing, Avy. So beautiful!
    I never read Lolita, I think I should..

       xx
       Tali
       www.Fetishists-Notes.com

    ReplyDelete
  9. Everything you write is so meaningful. I need to read Lolita now, I think.

    xxLiora
    lioraatsea.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. Best book ever ♥

    ReplyDelete
  11. You are one heck of a writer.. Everything here spells intriguing.. mysterious.. I love the title! I love the somberness in your voice.. I love the imagery and the flow!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I was absent from the blogging world and just rediscovered your beautiful writing. Thank you :)

    ReplyDelete
  13. my mother always gets upset when i look through her old photos, jewelry, love letters...
    i wonder from where his fear comes from.
    you are the most amazing follower, and a sweetie. thank you for your comments! xo

    ReplyDelete
  14. Amazing post!!
    If you want, we can follow each other!! let me know!

    http://estilohedonico.blogspot.pt/

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  15. Love your post, you really know how to write. lolita is a great book
    Kisses
    Aga

    Check my new post
    www.agasuitcase.com

    ReplyDelete
  16. I really like your blog dear!
    Keep up with the good work! ;)

    Kisses!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Beautiful, mysterious photos.
    The writing is sublime.

    le fresne x

    ReplyDelete

  18. Wonderful Post!
    Good week....Kisses

    http://www.facebook.com/couturetrend1

    http://couturetrend.blogspot.it/

    ReplyDelete
  19. Best blog title ever.Would you like to follow each other?

    WWW.ROXTHEFOX.COM

    ReplyDelete
  20. love lolita! You have gorgeous blog. I love all those pictures <3

    ReplyDelete
  21. Avy, I don't comment much, but know this, I read all of your posts. I'm hooked. You really have a touch. A way of fading the edges but getting the point across. You never write more than you should, or less than we need.
    And the images are always perfect.
    just wanted to let you know I appreciate your writing.
    ~rick

    ReplyDelete
  22. I always sleep in my mothers bed when she's away... t feels like she's besides me. we have this great connection, that sometimes suffocates me. But I love her, I love talking to her.

    http://littlemisstwiggy.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  23. I really like your blog dear!
    Keep up with the great work! :)

    XO

    ReplyDelete
  24. Great photos!
    I'm you newest follower, what about you being my newest follower too?

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  25. Hi honey!!
    I'm so sorry i've been a little busy lately so i can't visit and comments so much as i would like!!
    Loved your post!!
    Thanks so much for visit my blog and for your comment!!

    Big kiss!!

    www.marilynsclosetblog.com

    ReplyDelete
  26. Thank you for the comment.
    Interesting blog name, i love it.

    petitesideofstyle.com

    ReplyDelete
  27. I've been enjoying reading your latest posts here. It's been such a long time since last visited.. Thank you for the comment! Venice sounds like an amazing idea indeed, but I want to go there with loved one - and since he's going to Netherlands that's not an option this time. :) x

    Satu
    Indie by heart

    ReplyDelete
  28. Your writing is beautiful, I'm definitely following you - not least because of your blog name=)

    TIGERHEART

    ReplyDelete
  29. wonderful photography on this post lady!

    lindsey louise

    hellomrrabbit.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  30. Congrats on your nice blog , lovley ! May be you would like to check mine , I am currently hosting a GIVEAWAY of Michael Kors bag.
    Thank you so much in advance

    XX Luba
    Well Living Blog

    ::Michael Kors:: bag GIVEAWAY
    http://very-well-living.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  31. cool photos

    francesca
    www.frankvinyl.com

    ReplyDelete
  32. photo is so atmospheric...great! would you like to follow each other?

    katyalodiary.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  33. love those pics!!
    I invite you to follow my blog on http://laviecestchic.blogspot.com , hope that you like it!!
    kisses Marika

    ReplyDelete
  34. Hi darling! Very artistic pictures!
    I just discovered your blog..and I just love it!
    I follow you now, wanna follow me back? =)

    www.cmgvb.com
    www.cmgvb.com

    ReplyDelete
  35. That's such a curious (and good) question to ask; is one a Humbert or a Lo? I just finished reading that actually; I don't know how to feel about it but I think it's a good thing. Your writing is wonderful, by the way; I'll definitely have to keep reading. :) xx

    ReplyDelete
  36. lovely photos:)

    www.fourth-dimensions.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  37. Wonderful photos and amazing blog.

    http://fashionrascals1.blogspot.it/

    P.S. Love from Italy

    ReplyDelete
  38. Love the pictures!

    http://thevoice-offashion.blogspot.pt/

    ReplyDelete

Share