Monday, February 27, 2012

A little snowstorm

It should have been a calm weekend with S out on her date and mother back in Los Angeles for the Oscars (don't ask), but then there are those little things that remind of why I'm here. If New York is the powerful pulse that sends blood rushing through my veins again, then Carl is that irregular heartbeat that sometimes causes me to lose my balance and fall. I come to think of it too late at night like a quiet echo in my chest and I have to stay awake in the dark until the morning to get over the worst of the palpitations.

I see him with Chloe, I see them looking at each other, touching, holding hands in silence. It's torture but at least it's an emotion. Back in LA I was completely numb, watching days and weeks pass without notice. I know I hate it there but I couldn't even gather the strength to feel sad about it and it killed me. That city slowly suffocates all life and I'd rather stay up an entire night here, listening to the traffic outside and contemplating my lost chance at love, like this one and possibly the next.

26 comments:

  1. I can totally relate to this post...

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  2. darling it sounds like your heartsick. :(

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  3. I guess New York isn't so bad when you get to travel between the two cities and climates.

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  4. If it's of any consolation,it doesn't feel THAT special once you have it.

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  5. Thank you so much for your nice comment, Avy! ;*

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  6. thank you!
    very sad post.. but you have a great blog! I could spend hours reading it :)

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  7. Love your style. I,m a follower now!
    Check my blog at www.girlmeetsaccessories.blogspot.com
    If you like my blog you can follow me back

    xxx Maruschka

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  8. Did you take this photo? It's beautiful.

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  9. :) I know how you feel. Living two worlds. Xo

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  10. I know how it feels like. We all do. You're strong, Avy. More than you know. :)

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  11. I agree with what "I do,I do" said.
    You are strong Avy, and whatever happens, eventually it'll all make sense. Hang in there :)
    x

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  12. I love Snow!! The photo is beautiful! And I think majority of us know how you feel! Everything goon be ok :)
    Lots of LOVE AmenFashion17 xx

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  13. thanks for the nice comment (:
    I hope you'll eventually feel better with whatever happens.

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  14. Awesome post
    very nice blog im following you follow back please
    ♥ SadeeStyle ♥
    www.sadeestyle.net

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  15. I LOVE your blog...Great photos!Really enjoying your blog and am your newest follower. Please check mines out and follow me if you’d like =)

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  16. Nice photo!
    xx

    http://camneet.blogspot.com/

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  17. Nice photo! :))

    Much love from the SABO SKIRT girls!
    SHOP: www.saboskirt.com
    BLOG: www.saboskirt.blogspot.com

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  18. nothing is lost, and the next is never ever lost, Avy. No matter what. I love how you'd expressed your heavy heart. i can almost feel the snow on my lips,

    x

    L.

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  19. Lovely post. I love the photo, too.
    Feel better soon.

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  20. Hey Avy sweetheart, thank you very much for your lovely comment! Do you live in NYC or did you just come over to visit? I love your shot of the Radio City Music Hall, I've just recently seen a show there, such a great place! Your blog is awesome, following you right away, I love your texts! If you like mine too, feel free to do the same ;) Maybe we can even meet up one day ;) xo from the Big Apple
    http://hollylovespaul.blogspot.com/

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