Thursday, January 5, 2012

Big fish

I remember a hazy evening in someone's little apartment downtown, in the height of a summer that felt more like spring. We were young, most of us had just started drinking and some tried to smoke unfiltered Gauloises cigarettes in the hopes of looking a little like Sartre or Jean Luc Godard. Unsuccessfully of course.

Chloe had left me behind to go home with a hockey player, I sat on the floor zipping red wine from a tall beer glass when I saw him. Most people look attractive from behind, but when they turn around you can only wish that they hadn't. It ruins the enigma and those childish dreams of love at first sight.

He was standing by the book shelves across the room, talking to a girl in a dark green velvet dress and stiletto heels. She was laughing at something he said, he turned around and looked me straight in the eye from 20 feet away through a vibrating crowd of mumbling people. It was Carl.

This was years after those warm summer nights in the garden under the stars, I hadn't seen him since then and it felt like breathing under water. He could have destroyed me right there and then but didn't. I never dared ask him why.


35 comments:

  1. Wonderfully written - as aways

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  2. beautiful post!!amazing blog!!!i'm following you!!

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  3. There is always that someone, right?

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  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  5. Great photos...

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  6. You have got one of the best blogs I have seen recently.Creativity of any kind always attracts me and you are a masterpiece in that.Thanks for sharing so much. I am definitely following you.
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  7. Eloquently told as always... Your posts are like those short stories that always leave you wishing for more...
    Daphne.
    http://fashiondivamommy.blogspot.com

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  8. i love the 'it felt like breathing underwater' ... beautiful

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  9. You write so beautifully! Thank you for commenting and allowing me to find your blog <3

    Ellen xx

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  10. your precious words. you are an amazing writer. adore the part where you wish he did't turn around because "It ruins the enigma and those childish dreams of love at first sight."

    http://moustachesandotherthings.blogspot.com/

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  11. "Most people look attractive from behind" sounds like something you'd hear from a sex offender. The rest is wonderful.

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  12. wow, your writing. amazing. are you a published writer by any means?

    xo katrina
    theyoungbridgetjones.blogspot.com

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  13. "Most people look attractive from behind, but when they turn around you can only wish that they hadn't."
    OMG, TOTALLY AGREE. I say this all of the time, lol.
    Love the pictures:)

    ♥Abby

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  14. lovely and cool images. well done dear.

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  15. I love ur blog this big. I love all of ur posts. Keep it up girl. :D <3

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  16. Life and its unpredictability. You and your amazing words. Both cases match perfectly!

    You are beautiful. :)

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  17. Have a great new year! I love your writing, deep memories and feelings enlighten my day.


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  18. love your bliog especially the header
    xx the cookies
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  19. for when there is love, or deep like, isn't it always complicated? on some level.

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  20. you're a brilliant writer, this is wonderful :) xx

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  21. loving loving this post!!

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  22. your words, such perfect length and detail. where do you draw inspiration? i am a bit of an aspiring writer myself... although i should probably do a better job of writing things if i am going to call myself that. anyway. love your blog. i'm following. xx www.theleatherweather.com

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  23. ah, you are such a fluent writer :)
    hope you had a good new year x

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  24. lovely blog !

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  25. nice post
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  26. love your blog so <3

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  27. Love the wine glasses. So pretty. Great photos.

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