One of the things I remember: beside my father in his car, never in the back seat, driving in the middle of the autumn night with street lights like pearls in the darkness. He would be calm and make me calm and we would be the only ones fighting against the evils of this horrid world. Just him and me past fields and forests in the dark, going out and away from the metropolitan lights and the people, further and further until everything was black. On our own but not alone, not running away but searching for something bigger beyond the city borders. We would never find it but the dream of it being out there somewhere was enough, and the feeling of closeness would invade my system as he looked at me.
I remember the serenity when we would pull over somewhere and just breathe together. It follows from the absent need of saying anything at all, when everything has already been done and the rest is silence.
But above all, I remember thinking that maybe these are the finest moments of our lives, that maybe nothing will ever be better than this. It scared me back then and it scares me know, as I come closer and closer to knowing whether it was true or not.