Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Killing a flower

Since last November I've had a purple orchid in my bedroom window, placed in a small Lalique crystal vase my mother bought in Paris. It was as graceful and elegant as a piece of Dior jewelry, but I never cared enough to water it. After a couple of months it started shedding its sculpted flowers, but as long as it was alive I could think of it as a reminder that I'm a good person. I convinced myself that I loved it and secretly hoped it would be enough, but of course it wasn't.

The last dried out little flower fell off today as I watched it from my bed. It looked like a statement, like a public suicide in front of the people who never cared and never bothered to listen. Is that who I am?

I went outside, called S and just sat there quiet with her broken voice in my ear for an hour. I would never let anything happen to her, my beautiful little flower.


  1. You are not like you're orchid. You are just as beautiful, but so much stronger. And such a good friend

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  4. An orchid's blooms will fall sooner or later, regardless of care - even if you water it perfectly. It's part of the plant's life cycle. Think of it as beauty hiding until the season is right to bloom again.

  5. even if I water those damn flowers I STILL can't keep them alive. Orchids and me don't get along too well.

  6. Flowers can be like that, but so nice you had one!! it was very beautiful ... and such a pretty butterfly as well ^^